


It's 4:03 and I can't sleep (without you next to me)

by uswnt_nwsoccer



Series: Don't care if we fall from grace. [6]
Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-14
Updated: 2013-11-14
Packaged: 2018-01-01 13:45:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1044665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uswnt_nwsoccer/pseuds/uswnt_nwsoccer





	It's 4:03 and I can't sleep (without you next to me)

Stockholm was a little colder than she had expected. Megan was waiting for her at the airport. Maybe she should have opted to take a taxi back to their apartment; but then again her Swedish was as good as her German,

"you look like shit Meg"

"Gee, thanks Ash, good to see you too you ass"

It was good to smile again. The uncertainty of her relationship with Ali was still there, but she decided to push it to the back of her head, at least until she got some rest.

Apparently getting some rest was easier said than done. Fucking jetlag. She should be sleeping really. Tomorrow she is meeting the coach, staff and her new teammates.

Also she wants to be asleep because at least in her dreams the distance between her and Ali was nonexistent. In her dreams Ali could be cuddling up next to her, seeking for warmth even if it was hot outside because she was always cold. Ashlyn was warm. Opposites attract right?

***************

"Oh my god! She didn't! they didn't!" Ali could almost jump in excitement if she was injured of course. "Are you seeing that!'

"Yes babe I can see it" 

They were sitting together on the couch watching the game, when Pinoe pulled out the note after celebrating her goal. Happy birthday Kriegy. So simple; yet the fact that even if they were in the Olympics they still thought about her, it made it special.

"Man I wish I was there, that definitely beat my birthday wishes" Ashlyn said from Ali's lap.

Ali smiled at her, here they were Ashlyn recovering from her ACL, Ashlyn with a dislocated shoulder; watching the games from afar.

"Nothing beats having you here with me"

\---------------------------------------

Moving to Germany was one of the best decisions of her life. Unfortunately she wasn't in the same city as Ali, but at least there wasn't an ocean between them anymore. Just a train trip away.

"Hey babe what's up?"

"I miss you that's all, are you still going to be able to make it down here this weekend?" Ali asked from the other end.

"Yeah of course I have to be back Sunday though."

"What? Why? you're only going to be here for a day?"

"Who said I'm getting there Saturday?"

"What?"

"Could you open the door?"

No. Ashlyn Harris.

"You didn't"

Ali moved as fast as she could to the door, of course Ash could do something like traveling two days before anticipated and surprise her. Gosh she was so in love with that woman. She loved-

"Ali Krieger?"

Ali could only nod in response.

"Ash wha-"

"What's up baby?"

"it's not you" Ali said in a small voice. grabbing the box and going back inside. 

"What do you mean Ali?" 

"I thought it was you at the door" Ashlyn could hear the disappointment in Ali's voice "You said to open the door and I thought"

"You thought it was me knocking?"

"Well how else would you know someone was at my door?"

"Because I could see the man from down hall"

Ali turned to the door again; she watched how the handle turned and the door slowly opened.

"You should lock your door, what if I was thief?"

Ashlyn Fucking Harris.

"Fuck you!"

And she threw herself into her keeper's embrace.

"I missed you too babe" Ashlyn said with a chuckle and held Ali closer.

No more distance between them for now. Ashlyn loved being able to hold her like this, the smell of her shampoo filling her nostrils. She felt at peace. She felt at home.

\-----------------------------------

The news of a new league in the USA found their way to them. It was the perfect opportunity to go back and be together. Of course there was the whole possibility that they could be allocated in opposite coasts but t least they would be home.

She prayed Ash shared her same excitement. Her answer came in the form of Ashlyn unexpectedly bursting through her door and picking her up.

"We are going back right?" Ashlyn exclaimed searching for an answer in her eyes. That nose crinkle was all the response she needed. She had come to love Germany but only because it possessed the only thing she loved the most in the world. And now she was taking her back with her to the States.

Rainbows and butterflies from now on.

If only.

******************

Ashlyn woke to the smell of coffee and toast. She smiled, but the smile faltered once she opened her eyes and realized that she wasn't in her apartment in Washington and Ali would be waiting for her in the kitchen. 

It was kind of impossible considering Ali never woke up before her to make coffee. 

She sighed and took her time getting ready for the day, with this jetlag it would feel like one hell of long day. 

She walked to her kitchen to be met with a face she hadn't seen in a long time. 

"Well you're looking bright today Ash"

Ashlyn walked through the kitchen looking for a mug to pour some coffee "Are you saying I don't usually look bright?" she turned with a serious look on her face that only lasted for a whole 30 seconds before bursting out laughing with Whitney. She walked towards her and hugged her. "I've missed your face" 

They spent the rest of the morning catching up and getting ready for practice; Ashlyn first practice, or evaluation really. 

After practice came the inevitable conversation and lecture from Whitney. 

"Have you called her?" 

"No" 

"Why not?"

"It's late over there" 

"Bullshit"

"I don't know what to say to her"

"Now we're getting somewhere"

"I-I just know she's probably hating me right now"

Whitney sighed, and ran a hand over her face.

"What did you do?" 

"I left"

"She knew you were leaving, so what did you really do?"

"without saying goodbye. I left her there in our room after we had sex. we didn't talk just- and I didn't say goodbye"

"Jesus Ash why would you- why?"

"Whitney I couldn't say goodbye, I- I knew if I stayed and waited for her to say goodbye I wouldn't leave, but she didn't stopped me either" Ashlyn had tears threatening to roll down her cheeks if she blinked. Silent tears. 

The tears rolled down, and her composure shattered. She could feel the distance between them, the weight on her shoulders telling her that distance was worse because now there was no communication between them; the more she thought about it, the more she felt her strength leaving her. 

Whitney offered her the only comfort she could offered. She pulled Ashlyn closer and held her while she cried; and when the sobs subsided she said the only thing she knew was right.

"You're stupid you know"

"I know" Ashlyn replied because it was true. Only a stupid person would put themselves through the pain she was putting herself in. 

She knew Ali wanted to be close to her family, that's why they went back to the states in the first place. So why did she take this contract with Tyresö. 

Maybe she thought Ali would follow, like she had followed her.


End file.
